Yesterday I posted a blog that mentioned the book The Sense of Being Stared At by Rupert Sheldrake.
I looked behind my cubicle wall to see a VERY LARGE wood spider.
It has to be 2 inches wide and it looks as though it has fangs. I also saw her holding a large egg sack.
“Great,” I thought. I sat here all night with a large scary spider inches from my feet. I really do not like big spiders. I am not a big fan of the movie Arachnophobia either. (I screamed A LOT during that movie.)
Please note that I used to say all spiders, but now I do not mind the little ones. Honestly, I am less afraid since I remembered my past life as Howard who despised the spiders that easily crawled out of the place he was trapped.
Here is the problem. I know they are good. They eat other bugs. I know they are just living life as I am. My kids give me a hard time when I kill bugs. I have, in the past, put a general message out to all insects (including arachnids) not to come into my house and they will stay alive. (They have been warned.)
I have been trying very hard to change my old habit and to not exterminate them.
What do you do when you believe that every living thing is precious and that we are all one?
Do you scream and smash the icky spider? Do you squirt it with a lot of bug spray?
Do you let it live behind your office wall? (Knowing it could crawl up your leg any minute while you are engrossed in writing.)
Back and forth I go. What to do.
UGH. Torn. I am torn. It is a very large spider. Do I crawl behind my cubicle wall and come face to face with a very large scary spider … and to scoop it up, carry it upstairs and put it outside?
What would you do?
Then I think, “Well … I did sit here several hours without it crawling on me.” I am thankful for that.
I check my Ted Andrews Animal Speak book to see if there is a meaning to seeing this creature. (I open it right to the spider page.) Its message is to maintain balance, awaken creative sensibilities and more. Incredibly, the last paragraph in this section asks, “Do you need to write?”
Yes, in fact I do.